Heartbeats (Perspectives #3.75)

Shane was absolutely not hiding from his guests. Nope. He didn’t hide, and he certainly didn’t hide from people he’d had a hand in inviting over for the afternoon.  

Except he kind of was.

He peered out through the kitchen window at his yard full of happy, smiling guests. All of them friends, some of them family by choice, and each one of them welcome here. Instead of their traditional stop at a community barbecue hosted by local business owner Dixie Foskey, Shane and his boyfriend Noel Carlson had decided to throw their own impromptu barbecue. Partly as a “congratulations on your engagement” for their friends Jon and Isaac, but mostly because Noel was obsessed with his new favorite toy.

And no, the toy was not silicone or dick-shaped. It was the shiny monstrosity taking over the left corner of their patio, some fancy combination barbecue/smoker thing. For a guy who’d once admitted to burning a pot of water, Noel had come a very long way in the two years they’d been together. He’d graduated from a basic charcoal grill to this new beast, and he produced some amazing stuff. His smoked beer-can chicken was award-worthy and completely addictive.

Noel was holding court around the barbecue, his blond hair still slicked back from his earlier dunk in the pool, sunglasses perched on his nose. Shane’s hot cop was as hot as ever, dressed down in a pair of board shorts that showed off his toned abs and summer-tanned skin.

His audience consisted of Grace and her boyfriend Todd; Grace was the cousin of Isaac Gregory, a special guest at the party. Shane and Noel had met Isaac through his boyfriend-now-fiancé Jon Buchanan, who was the best friend of Gabe Henson, who was the boyfriend of Noel’s BFF, Tristan Lavalle.

Their little gathering was complex, but it worked for them. Shane genuinely liked both Jon and Isaac. Jon had a flirtatious, prankster side to him that reminded Shane a lot of Tristan. And Shane adored Tristan—not only because Noel loved him, but also because Tristan had survived so much in the past five years and was still so full of joy.

Like right now. Shane spotted him ducked low to the patio surrounding the in-ground pool, stealthily approaching his boyfriend Gabe from behind. Gabe and Jon were standing by the pool’s edge talking. Shane bit his bottom lip and waited.

Tristan pounced on Gabe, sending the pair of them splashing into the pool on twin shouts that came right through the glass windows. All around them, people hooted and hollered. The biggest laughs came from Gabe’s dads. Richard and Bear were seated at an outdoor dining set, relaxing with a pair of drinks and enjoying the company of Noel’s police partner, Wade Benedict.

Shane had been shocked when Benedict accepted their invitation. Noel had said he’d told Benedict he wouldn’t be the oldest person there, that Gabe’s parents were also attending. Noel had forgotten to mention Gabe’s parents were two guys, but Benedict seemed to be keeping up a steady stream of conversation with them.

Gabe was sputtering in the pool, and his shock seemed to turn into revenge, because he began stalking Tristan toward the shallow end, where Benny Taylor was swimming with Todd’s daughter Crystal. Shane knew Benny through their shared go-go dancing work at the club owned by Gabe’s dads, Big Dick’s, but it had been Tristan who’d invited him. Apparently, Tristan and Benny had met last month at a birthday party and had been messaging a lot.

Noel and Gabe had to be ecstatic that Tristan was continuing to grow and make new friends, instead of clinging so hard to what was familiar. Not that Shane blamed Tristan for that. New experiences still came with the small chance that Tristan would forget.

The only person he didn’t see anywhere was—the kitchen door opened, and Isaac stepped inside. He wore swim trunks and a t-shirt, and hints of sunburn—probably from his recent vacation to the Outer Banks—peeked out on his arms and neck.

“Hey, sorry,” Isaac said, a little startled, as if he’d been caught doing something wrong. “I just came in to use the bathroom.”

Shane smiled. “Better than peeing in the pool.”

“I’d never do that.” Isaac looked so affronted Shane stopped smiling. He often forgot that until late last year, Isaac had been a shut-in, and he tended to take things kind of personally. And literally. But he was a sweet guy, if a little afraid of Shane’s dog Misty. The gray mutt was sweet as can be, but Shane had mercy and put her in their guest room for the party, along with a huge bone to gnaw on.

“It was a joke,” Shane said. “Sorry, go ahead. You know where it is?”

“Yes, thank you. Noel pointed it out when we arrived.”

“Okay.”

Isaac slunk away, and Shane felt bad. As if he’d embarrassed Isaac somehow, which hadn’t been his intention. But other than that ridiculous human Elf on the Shelf prank Gabe had pulled on Tristan last December, Shane hadn’t really spent time with Jon and Isaac. Mostly, if they spent time with their mutual sets of friends, it was Shane and Noel with Gabe and Tristan. Or, he assumed, Gabe and Tristan with Jon and Isaac.

The six of them definitely needed to do more together, and the party was a good start.

Shane fiddled with closed bags of chips, even though full bowls were outside, currently being snacked on while the meat finished cooking. The rest of the side dishes were in the fridge or waiting on the counter to be opened and served. There was literally nothing left to do in the kitchen, and yet Shane couldn’t leave, and he couldn’t explain why. He knew most of the people out there pretty well, except for Isaac’s family. He loved sitting out by the pool on hot summer days.

Isaac returned to the kitchen and paused. “You’re still here.”

Shane bit back an instinct to retort, “Yeah, I do live here,” because Isaac would probably think he’d done something wrong again. “Yeah, I’m still here.”

“You know…” Isaac approached slowly, hands tucked behind his back. “I do sort of feel bad that you had to lock your dog up.”

“Don’t worry about it. She’s happy with her bone, and I don’t think she’d do well with a big crowd. She’s a rescue and still kind of shy.”

“Oh. I see.” Isaac’s big brown eyes went soft. “Like I rescued Bear, and then Jon rescued me.” This Bear in question was not the burly man sipping margaritas by the pool. Isaac’s Bear was a gray kitten who was barely pushing a year old. He’d seen pictures, because Jon was head-over-heels for the beast and loved to show her off. Cat Bear was adorable.

The comment about Jon rescuing Isaac made him pause, because yeah, based on the story of their romance, Jon had been the one to get Isaac out of that big house he lived in all alone and exploring the world again. A year ago, before Jon, Isaac never would have been at this barbecue celebrating their engagement.

Shane peered out the window to Noel, who was laughing at something. “I guess, in that way, Noel rescued me, too. I was in a bad place when we first met, and we fought hard to make it work, despite me repeatedly pushing Noel away. I wouldn’t have gotten through losing Jason without him.”

“Jason?”

Shane startled, surprised Tristan hadn’t told this story to Jon and Isaac. Or maybe it wasn’t a story Tristan thought to tell, because Tristan had still had severe short-term memory issues when it all happened. And after losing Jason, Tristan had offered his condolences four times before his memory began improving.

“Before I met Noel, I lived with my older brother Jason,” Shane said. A pang of grief hit him. He and Jason had been dirt-poor and up to their necks in debt, but they’d loved each other unconditionally. “Almost two years ago, end of this month, he died of a massive heart attack.”

Isaac’s face pinched. “I’m so sorry. You said older brother?”

“He was only thirty-two, but he had a hereditary heart condition that thickened his heart muscles over time. Eventually, it gave out.” Shane hadn’t cried over Jason in almost a year now, but a familiar burn rose in his chest and stung his nose. “It’s something Noel is militant about me having checked every six months.”

“Your heart?”

Shane nodded. “Yeah. So far, so good, but I’m also younger than Jason was when he first had symptoms, so…” He didn’t like to think of a future where he and Noel heard the worst news, and then spent the next year or less wondering if and when Noel would find another dead body clutching at his chest.

“It worries you?”

“It does.” He turned to face Isaac head on. “I try not to worry about it in front of Noel, though. Doesn’t do him any good.”

“If you worry, you should share that with your partner, not hide it. When I get anxious about being mostly deaf in a hearing world, I talk to Jon about it. It’s what Noel is there for.”

Shane blinked. Sure, he’d been told once Isaac was deaf in one ear and used a hearing aid for the other, but he’d have never guessed it while conversing with him. “I know that in my head, but I’m also a stubborn brat sometimes. Especially when I want to protect someone I love.”

“That’s understandable, I suppose, but do you really need to protect Noel from your emotions?”

Well, when Isaac said it that way, the whole thing sounded ridiculous. “I guess not.”

Isaac smiled. “Then are you going to come out and mingle with your guests, or continue hiding in the kitchen?”

“Mingle,” Shane replied with a rusty chuckle. “Thanks for the talk, man.”

“No problem. It’s nice being able to offer advice again, after being given so much of my own.”

He followed Isaac into the backyard. Someone’s phone was playing rock music at a low enough volume that it didn’t impede conversations. Isaac crossed the patio to stand by Jon, who was laughing at Tristan and Gabe’s antics in the pool. Shane glanced to his left at Noel, whose blinding smile made Shane grin. Noel also tilted his head, silently asking of Shane was okay. Shane nodded, then wandered to his boyfriend’s side.

The scent of wood smoke and sizzling meat made Shane’s stomach growl. “When do we eat, Meat Master?” Shane asked.

Noel waggled his eyebrows. “Soon.”

“Your boyfriend is trouble,” Grace said to Shane. “He’s got Todd convinced he needs a smoker, too, but we live in a third-floor apartment.”

“We could keep it at your parents’ house,” Todd said.

“And who are you going to smoke meat for? I’m a vegetarian and Crystal won’t eat anything more complex than chicken nuggets and applesauce.”

“I think you’re going to lose this battle, dude,” Shane said to Todd. “But considering all the meat Noel bought for the smoker today, I’m sure you’ll be able to go home with some leftovers.”

“Leftovers?” Noel said. “With this bunch? We’ll be lucky to have a single potato chip left.”

True story.

Their group could put some food away.

“Actually,” Noel added, “We’ll be ready in about five minutes, so why don’t you grab some help and start putting the rest of the food out?”

“Sounds good.” Shane leaned over to place a quick kiss on Noel’s mouth.

Grace and Todd volunteered to help without being asked, so Shane led them into the kitchen. Between the three of them, they soon had the outdoor dining table laden with cold salads, rolls, condiments, and a platter of cut watermelon. Shane delivered a handful of serving platters to Noel, so he could transfer the smoked brisket, chicken and ribs, as well as grilled vegetable kebabs and corn on the cob.

Once Shane saw all the food spread out on the long table, he started rethinking the whole “not having leftovers” thing. The dining set hadn’t come with enough chairs for everyone, so some folks would have to use the outdoor furniture spread out across the patio, as well as the extra beach chairs Jon had brought over.

But they all gathered around the table first, not to pray—Shane wasn’t religious, much like most of his friends—but they could still have a moment before they dug in.

“I want to thank everyone for coming,” Noel said, taking his time to look around the table. “Shane and I have only been here about a year and a half, and while some of you have been over, this is my and Shane’s first big get-together. So thank you for helping us pop our party cherry.”

Tristan and Benny giggle-snorted louder than everyone else.

Shane caught Richard whispering something to his husband Bear about not having had any cherries for several decades. While he loved his bosses and enjoyed working for them, he didn’t need to know about their sex life.

“Please help yourself to the food,” Shane added. “I promise Noel didn’t make everything, he was only allowed to handle the grill.”

Noel pinched his ass. They both hung back, allowing their guests to serve themselves first from the variety of food and meat. Eventually, Shane grabbed his own plate and took a little bit of everything, because it all looked and smelled amazing. He settled on one of the beach chairs near Tristan, Benny and Gabe.

Richard had brought the marinated veggie skewers, and they were amazing. Mushrooms, peppers, cherry tomatoes, onion, and zucchini in some kind of Italian spiced sauce that had caramelized on the grill. Shane savored his single skewer and sort of hoped he could manage a second one. All of the meat was perfect, because when Noel set his mind to do something, he didn’t fail.

Tristan and Benny kept up light conversation, a lot of it Tristan asking Benny questions about his second job. Benny was a porn model for a local producer, and Tristan seemed fascinated by the idea. Gabe and Jon were also ex-models, just like Shane. But unlike Shane, Gabe, Jon and Benny enjoyed their time as models. Shane had done it for the cash, plain and simple, so he didn’t add anything to the conversation. Sometimes it was embarrassing to remember there was video evidence of Shane having sex with all three of his guests.

And if it bothered Noel, he didn’t mention it.

Shane didn’t like thinking about his time doing porn, because those months were tangled up with his memories of Jason’s declining health. And with meeting Noel, who was the absolute best thing in Shane’s life. He could never regret their relationship. He just wished Jason had lived long enough to see how incredibly happy and successful Shane was.

Okay, so maybe not successful. Shane still worked two part-time jobs: one at Mineo’s Deli right there in Stratton, and also his once-a-week dancing gig at Big Dick’s. He filled in for other dancers once in a while, if someone was sick or had an emergency, but the jobs weren’t exactly what everyone hoped for on career day.

He had no idea of Jason would be proud of Shane or not. For surviving. For thriving. For being fucking happy. All Jason had ever wanted was for Shane to be happy.

“Dude, your boyfriend is a genius with meat,” Benny said.

Shane looked up from his plate and winked. “He really is.”

Instead of blushing like most straight guys would, Benny grinned at him. Benny was supposedly gay-for-pay as a porn model, but Shane didn’t know the guy personally. Maybe there was more to him. There usually was, especially with the guys who filmed for Chet Green.

“Seriously, though,” Benny said, “these ribs just fall off the bone. My dad used to cook his ribs in the oven and you’d have to rip the meat off with your teeth.”

“Low and slow,” Shane said. “I’m partial to the beer-can chicken.” Growing up poor, chicken had been a staple protein. Red meat had been a rare treat, so his taste buds still tended to side with chicken dishes or beef or pork.

Then again, Shane would probably even dare to try beef tongue if Noel put it in that magical smoker.

“I’ve never had brisket before,” Tristan said. “This is super good.”

“Really?” Gabe asked. “I’ll have to take you to that barbecue joint out on Waterford Street. They’ve got these delicious brisket sandwiches, with vinegar slaw and spicy mayo.”

Tristan’s blue eyes gleamed. “That sounds amazing. My parents weren’t big on barbecue, so if we went out it was to fine dining places. I’d love a good Texas-style barbecue place.”

“I think this place does Kansas City-style barbecue.”

“What’s the difference?”

“Spices? I don’t know, it’s all good to me.”

Wade Benedict must have been half-listening to the conversation, because he turned in his chair at the table and launched into a speech about the differences between about six different kinds of barbecue, all named after either a city or a state. Tristan listened with rapt attention to the entire thing.

Shane glanced around. Noel, playing the consummate host, was hovering near the table, eating while standing, and conversing with their guests. Guilt wormed through Shane’s gut. He should be doing that, too, but Shane wasn’t as good at chatting up people as Noel. The talent helped Noel as a police officer. As a ex-stripper, ex-porn model, and deli counter sandwich assembler, talking wasn’t a talent Shane had ever really developed.

Instead of hosting, Shane was hiding with the two people he knew best and not really talking unless spoken to. He hadn’t even initiated his earlier conversation with Isaac.

Am I antisocial?

Nah, he simply wasn’t a social butterfly so most of the guys here. The only person who was quieter than Shane was Isaac, and Isaac had a better reason for being shy.  But, seated at the table between Jon and Richard, Isaac seemed to be attempting to engage Richard and Bear in conversation.

Gabe gently elbowed Shane in the ribs. “Dude. You okay?”

“I’m fine,” Shane replied quietly. “Guess I’m not feeling the party mood today.”

“The party your idea or Noel’s?”

“We both wanted to do something for Jon and Isaac when they told us the news about the engagement. I thought Noel meant drinks, not a big barbecue.”

Gabe frowned. “Yeah, that part was probably Tristan’s doing. When I told him the news, he got excited about a big party, and then he remembered you guys have a pool and called Noel.”

Shane shot a brief glare at the side of Tristan’s head, but Tristan was busy talking to Benny about barbecue spices and something about bark.

“Sorry, man,” Gabe said.

“It’s fine, everyone’s having fun. Noel got to smoke meat. Tristan got to swim.”

“I bet Isaac would have preferred your plan for quiet drinks.”

“Probably.”

“You know, for having done porn, I didn’t figure you for such an introvert.”

Shane shrugged. “Porn wasn’t something I did for fun.”

“I could tell.”

Gabe had actually been the one to give Shane the lead about dancing at Big Dick’s, after they’d shot together a few times. Shane had been happy to finally leave porn behind, and despite it being a little awkward seeing a former co-star sometimes, Shane was glad Gabe and Tristan got together. Gabe was a genuinely good guy, and Tristan shined around him.

Even porn stars deserved a happily ever after.

Everyone ate themselves silly. When Shane finished his first plate, he decided to help Noel play host by offering to refill his guests’ drinks. Opening new beers, topping off margarita glasses from the pitcher sitting on ice, fetching another ginger ale for Isaac, who wasn’t interested in any of the alcohol.

Shane helped himself to a beer, then joined Noel, who was chatting with Benedict about a call they’d responded to the night before, while the rest of the table listened. Noel had told him this story this morning, while guzzling coffee and seasoning the brisket. Noel and Benedict worked first shift, which was eleven at night until seven in the morning, and Noel slept during the day.

Right now, he was running on almost twenty-four hours of no sleep, and no one could tell except Shane. Shane saw the fatigue in his eyes and the strain of his smile, but Noel wouldn’t complain until their last guest left. Then he’d probably collapse face-first onto the couch. Shane would happily clean up by himself, given how much sleep Noel was sacrificing for his friends.

Friends and family.

Noel draped his arm around Shane’s waist, so Shane did the same. He accepted a bit of Noel’s weight, too, happy to support his partner however Noel needed. Benedict did most of the talking, further displaying Noel’s fatigue. His personal record was thirty-one hours awake, and that had been partly Shane’s fault, back when they first got together.

The story ended with a lot of laughter from the audience. Shane used its cover to put his lips close to Noel’s ear and whisper, “No one will miss you if you go take a power nap. Thirty minutes will do you wonders.”

“What about our guests?” Noel whispered back.

“They’ll be fine. This is relax and talk time. You’ll be back before everyone starts swimming again. They’ll understand.”

“Okay.”

Noel could be as stubborn as Shane, and Shane silently cheered that Noel was giving in this easily. He simply excused himself from the table and went inside. No one questioned it, and the conversation continued. Eventually, the music got louder, more alcohol was passed around, and dancing happened.

Shane decided to clean up by taking the mayo-based cold salads back into the kitchen and out of the summer heat. The meat and cooked veggies would be fine for a while longer, plus people were still snacking as they passed by the table. Everyone was dancing, except for Richard and Benedict. The pair seemed to have hit it off and were chatting with their legs in the pool. Then again, Richard could charm anyone with his big smiles and flamboyant personality.

Seeing people who might never have otherwise met make connections was pretty amazing. Benedict had been a little “no homo” when Noel first came out, so him still hanging out with Richard would have Noel ecstatic when he got back from his nap.

Shane tried to remember where he’d left his phone so he could check how long Noel had been napping when Tristan grabbed his arm and tugged him into the group of dancers. Unable to resist the buzz of beer and joy of dancing, Shane didn’t try to resist. He let the music flow through his muscles and stir his blood, like it did once a week on that go-go platform. Some day he wouldn’t be able to dance like this, and he’d take every opportunity that came his way, while he was still young and healthy.

Guys drifted in and out of the group. Shane’s first beer became his second, and then his third, as he burned off both the alcohol and his lunch. Sweat dripped from his brow thanks to the heat and summer sunshine, and he was about ready for a dip in the pool. Bear and Gabe were the first to cannonball into the deep end. Benny, Tristan and Grace followed moments later. Since Todd had lost his girlfriend, he and Crystal waded into the shallow end together.

The novelty of having a little girl around wasn’t lost on Shane. He’d never given any thought to being a dad, and Noel had only mentioned it in vague passing. Right now, they were good with having a dog.

Speaking of Noel….

Jon grabbed Isaac and Shane, and he charged at the pool. Shane couldn’t think to resist when the lure of the cold water on his hot skin was too wonderful. He hit with a shout and a slight tangle of bodies, and he came to the surface to gulp in air. The pool cooled him immediately, and he splashed at Jon for dragging him into it.

The pool hadn’t been on their house wish list when he and Noel had decided to buy a place together, and Shane had found out after they closed that Noel had always wanted to live in a house with a pool. Growing up, Noel and his siblings had spent hours a day at the community pool, but there was no privacy and no parties were allowed. Now Noel could have all the pool parties he wanted. Hell, with their fenced-in backyard, he could sunbathe in the nude, if he wanted to.

Shane still hadn’t convinced him to try that. They had, however, gone skinny dipping a few times after dark.

Noel.

Shane swam for the deep end’s ladder and ignored his friends teasing him for being done so soon. A flare of worry burned hot in Shane’s gut. Noel had been gone way longer than thirty minutes, and Shane needed to know why.

Jason was late getting ready for his date with Elizabeth. Then I found him.

No, this was nothing like Jason. For starters, Noel didn’t have a dangerous, potentially deadly heart condition and healthy twenty-five year-olds didn’t just drop dead.

Except they did, for rare but medically sound reasons—stop it!

Shane grabbed a beach towel, not even sure whose towel he had, and draped it over his shoulders. He burst into the house, uncaring that he was dripping pool water all over the kitchen floor. According to the time on the microwave clock, Noel had been gone for over an hour, maybe closer to two. “Noel!”

He checked the living room couch first. Empty. Then he raced upstairs. The sound of his voice had Misty scratching and whining behind the guest room door, but he ignored her for now. Their bedroom door was closed.

Jason’s door was shut too.

“Noel?” His voice cracked.

Real fear turned his insides to ice as Shane reached for the knob and turned. Pushed the door open.

Noel was sprawled on his side of the bed, arms wrapped around Shane’s pillow, snoring softly. Shane stared as his brain transposed old memories of seeing Jason dead on his own bed, clutching at his chest, with his boyfriend alive and well. Snoring, so he was definitely breathing.

Relief hit him so sharply that Shane fell to his knees hard. The bump of his landing made the wall shake and a framed picture rattle. Noel jack-knifed up in bed, startled eyes casting around the room until he spotted Shane.

“Fuck, Jo, what’s wrong?” Noel bolted to his side.

“You’re okay.” Shane grabbed Noel’s shoulders simply to feel the warm skin beneath his hands. “You’re alive.”

“Of course I am.” More of Noel’s West Memphis accent came out when he was distressed. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“You didn’t come back.” Shane dragged Noel into a hug, needing his boyfriend in his arms. Needing to hear his wildly thumping heartbeat and smell his skin. “You came inside and you didn’t come back.”

“Oh, babe, it’s okay.” Noel brought his arms up and squeezed Shane tighter. “I guess I forgot to set my phone alarm before I passed out. I’m so sorry.”

Shane coughed, because no way would he admit that had been a sob. “No, my fault. I just…was thinking about Jason earlier, and it was such a stupid assumption. He was sick, and you aren’t.”

“It’s okay, it’s fine.” Noel squeezed the back of his neck, then pulled back a bit. His blue eyes searched Shane’s face. “Why were you thinking about Jason?”

“I started missing him today, out of the blue, and I made an offhand comment to Isaac about you keeping me together after I lost Jason, but Isaac didn’t know who Jason was, so I told him. About his heart condition and how he died.”

Noel flinched. “I feel like such a bastard for scaring you.”

“You didn’t do it on purpose. You needed the sleep.”

“And I nearly gave you a heart attack.” Noel’s eyes widened. “Fuck, sorry, that’s not a good metaphor right now.”

“It’s okay.” Shane dragged Noel up so they could sit together on the bed, Shane’s wet trunks be damned. “To be honest, I’m more worried about the opposite scenario happening one day. You walking in here and finding me dead. Of a heart attack.”

“Oh, Jo.” Noel raised one of Shane’s hands to his mouth and kissed the knuckles. “Why haven’t you ever said anything?”

“Because it’s my issue, my fear. Or so I thought. Isaac said I should lean on my partner, share these things with him. So this is me. Sharing.”

Which was not something Shane did easily. He preferred bottling up his secrets, fear and pain, and then dealing with them himself, usually with beer. Or waiting until he exploded and lashed out at the people he loved.

“I’m so proud of you,” Noel said. “You have no fucking idea how proud I am, because I know this is a big part of your life. Not just Jason, but making sure you stay healthy, too. And I know I can be a little overbearing when it comes to eating right and watching your beer intake.”

“But you mother hen because you love me, and I love you, too. So much. You know I want us to have a long, happy life together, and we both went into this with our eyes wide open. I could develop hypertrophic cardiomyopathy at any moment, and you could get shot on duty.”

“So we live every day as best we can,” Noel said, repeating lines from a familiar conversation, “and we love each other as fiercely as we can. No regrets.”

“Exactly.”

Those words might be as close to wedding vows as they ever took, and they were perfect. They fit the life they’d created for themselves, with just enough room in it for their friends. Friends they were currently neglecting, but who would understand.

Shane shivered and rested his damp head on Noel’s shoulder. Noel adjusted the towel so more of Shane’s torso was covered. Coming down off adrenaline kind of sucked, because it left Shane a shaky mess for a few minutes.

“People are going to notice both their hosts are missing soon,” Noel said. “Why don’t you take a warm shower, while I go downstairs and make an appearance.”

“No, I’m okay, I’ll go down with you. Besides, I fully intend for us to shower off the chlorine together. Later. When we can spend a lot more time naked.”

Noel laughed, then kissed him. Long and leisurely, instead of hot and intent. A kiss full of love and promise—they’d make their life together work no matter what. A kiss that relaxed Shane completely and had him sighing into Noel’s talented mouth.

Shane pulled back and kissed the tip of Noel’s nose. “I love you, Noel Carlson.”

“I love you back, Jody McShane. For as long as I have you.”

Which had better be a long, long time. We both deserve that and more.

“Come on, officer,” Shane said. “Let’s go rejoin our own damned party. We still haven’t toasted Jon and Isaac’s engagement.”

“Yes, we can’t forget that. Isaac doesn’t drink, so I bought sparkling grape juice.”

“You think of everything.”

Noel grinned, then pecked a kiss onto Shane’s cheek. “Yeah, pretty much. I am the brains of this outfit, after all.”

Shane squawked at the tease, but Noel had already dashed out the door. Ready to have his revenge through tickle torture, Shane stalked after his boyfriend. Past their barking dog, right downstairs and outside, where Shane chased him to the pool’s edge. Noel glanced left and right, but Shane had closed in on him.

“Uh oh,” Tristan said from somewhere in the pool. “What’s happening?”

Noel narrowed his eyes in a silent challenge. Shane charged.

They hit the water together, bodies tangled, and they came up laughing. Shane tried to tickle Noel, which didn’t work well underwater. Noel got his revenge by dunking Shane twice, because he was bigger, damn it. That devolved into a game of chicken fighting, with Tristan on Noel’s shoulders, and Shane balanced on Gabe’s. Tristan was scrappy, Shane had to give him that, but Shane toppled their pair first.

Gabe gave Shane a high five. “We make a good team.”

Shane glanced at Noel, who was laughing at them both and smiling. No hint of the usual jealousy he got when Shane and Gabe interacted, much less were actually touching. All Shane saw in his boyfriend’s expression was warmth, mirth, and love. Noel was all of those things.

Noel was home.

“Best two out of three,” Tristan yelled, and attempted to get back up on Noel’s shoulders.

“Oh, you’re on, Lavalle,” Shane replied, and then got ready to do chicken battle.